Wednesday, February 21, 2007

You're not Russell Brand

Sat quaffing cold, refreshing beverages with a chum last night, we encountered one of a growing number of Russell Brand-wannabes. You know the type. Anyway, an ode I wrote in tribute to the growing number of people wanting so very desperately to be someone else:


Your bad backcombed hairdo
Cost half a grand.
You wear a thin scarf,
But you're not Russell Brand.

Your stubble is thick
But your comedy's bland.
You wear skinny jeans,
But you're not Russell Brand.

Your spell in drug rehab
Was carefully planned.
but you had no problem.
You're not Russell Brand.

You're not Casanova,
The stud of the land.
You don't get the ladies.
You're not Russell Brand.

So why try to ape him?
On your own two feet stand.
You are your own person.
You're not Russell Brand.

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